I prostituted my car this morning.
With each person I picked up I thought of how many people out there don’t have the options that I have. What of those people who didn’t have a car to prostitute?
I opened it up to anyone who had money and I let them all come in, no questions asked. Just pay me Z$200 and you can jump in. I’ll take you where you are going. I won’t check if you are a potential thug. Just jump in. I had no protection- but I needed the money.
It started on Monday when I went to the ATM and couldn’t get any money. On Tuesday, the story was the same. Wednesday, Thursday and Friday- still no money. I got desperate. I could have changed some of the forex I have but the street rate was deliriously low. The bank rate was worse. The transfer rate was great, but I needed CASH.
So I started thinking of how on earth I could get this much sought after Zim dollar cash. Then, during a conversation with someone it hit me!
I could take the car out on the road and become a little commuter omnibus. That was last night. This morning I hit the road. Two return trips to Avondale at Z$100 per person gave me Z$1,000. Then I did a trip to Mount Pleasant at Z$200 per person. I only got three people on the out of town trip so that was Z$600. On the way back I had a full car. Another $1,000 dollars. One guy got of at Fife Avenue and there I picked up a young lady who I charged Z$100 to get into town. A total of Z$1,100 from that trip! What luck!
A total of Z$2,700. Enough for the vegetables I needed to buy.
But, I was in pain. With each person I picked up I thought of how many people out there don’t have the options that I have. What of those people who didn’t have a car to prostitute?
As I write this, the time is verging on 9pm, Saturday 20th September 2008. I know that as I am writing this out in the Avenues, they have come out onto the street to prostitute their vehicles of flesh. They will accept any man as long as he has the money. For them too, it started on Monday when they couldn’t get $1,000 from the ATM. For them too, it started on a Monday, many years ago, when someone stole the money that would have made Zimbabwe work better.